i was filled with such depression, i was filled with such delight

started the day with a typical bad day start, thought today would a bad 1
arrived in school 6.30, hoping to c Her earlier cos the last time she was earlier den me, realised i was too early, er basically because she didn't arrived yet... camped at the stone bench with nicholas den saw He walking out den realised Her might have been there alr, mayb camp wrong place... went in, saw Her, speechless... cant seem to find a topic... hmmz
couldn't hit the high notes at all when we sang 'every1 sang' i think its because no warm ups-miss yee' orders... zzz... was scolded by pamela for not moving... (sorry arh people tall harder to move, later like tower gg to collapse like that, not nice to c)
got scolded in history class when lewis lob the ball and i blocked it
the dear history teacher must have thought that i was playing it
i must clarify that i wasn't playing with it, jus block it so its doesn't roll out
abit feel like being scolded for something i didn't do wrong
den later PE, realised i forgot to bring the attire... so nv change
den 3h ppl was playing with the ball in the parade ground
apparently some idiot kicked the ball so hard that it hit the classroom
and den the ball was 'stucked' in some high place that only i could reach
i went for it,got scolded for playing ball in the parade ground...
feel like being scolded for nothing again, as if im the 1 who kicked it?
ran the 2.4, thought i would fail again as i usually did
i've yet to pass a 2.4 in secondary school yet, dun seem like it when u c me right?
that's why i always emphasize that my face is not trustworthy
but this time, miraclously,i passed, i started panting went i only ran abt 700m
but there was this thought that drove me on, power of love is great
i managed to pass, 15mins... i think that's a fail but at least tcher said pass
felt so happy, felt so much delight, didn't want to tell any1
wanted Her to be the 1st 1 to share this joy, though i know......
i seem to be really causing Her alot of problems, i could sense it
pressure on alot of sides, i can take it, but im jus worried for her
she doesn't deserve it, she didn't fall for me, i did for Her
1st there was this julia loh, den i realised xi tong knew too
dunno who told her because she said it was not Her who told her(confusing man)
den today after school, wanted to eat lunch with lewis they all
den we wait there, saw Her pass by den lewis go shout her name
ask her wanna join us anot, though he jolly well knew the answer
im feeling seriously very sorry, its all my fault, if time could be reversed i wouldn't do this, luckily i realised that He was lying to me(luckily?very funny hor)
He didn't stop loving Her at all, i was the third party
but at least now, she wont be hurt by me, there is He to shield Her
i can't shield Her,she's too far away, but He could, He could
i was relieved, if she is happy with He, i'll be glad for them
after all, He and Her and 2 of the persons who i trusted most...