Its lovely valentines! One day many believes is for love. To confess your love for the apple of your eye, to get together with what already is, and what will continue to be, a partner.

So writing all of that, and the fact that I'm writing, probably already signals to you that I'm alone, in front of the keyboard on such a lovely night. Its one of those days where you feel surprisingly empty, wanting a void to be filled, yet although you know what should be there, you don't know what you really want there.

Then again, I wouldn't really call this an empty night. Rather, its a night full of thoughts and reflections. Its just like the ones where you lie on your bed, unable to escape from reality and all you do is think. Random thoughts? Or heartaching ones?

They are what appears to be closest to the 'you' you don't want to show others.

Its disturbing though, to realise that no matter how much thinking I do, I arrive at the same conclusion, where I cannot forgive myself instead of trying to blame it upon others.

Really, it makes me wonder at times, if I'm suffering from depression.

Haha.